Life never turns the way you expect it to. There's an order to it all, but the details are so minuscule and so convoluted, that trying to sort them all out and comprehend them is utterly beyond us and our technology. One of the cornerstones of our interaction with the world of the 21st Century (or, any century, for that matter) is the Chaos Theory. The order of the universe lies hidden within the chaos that arises from the limitations of our knowledge, to appear only like silhouettes of lovers on a window shade. The subtleties of matter and energy throughout the universe are unknowable to us in their entirety, and, even those aspects that we do know are subject to the limitations of our measuring systems. So long as there is the least imperfection in our human knowing, chaos will control our prediction of the future.

Success in life is almost always counter-intuitive. About 15 years ago, I decided to buy a motorcycle. To get my license endorsement, I had to take a course and pass both a written and driving exam. What most struck me about learning the basics of controlling a motorcycle is that it doesn't steer like a bicycle. As a kid, I often used to ride my bike 'no hands', leaning left to turn left and right to turn right. Oddly, on a motorcycle, you lean away from the direction of the turn. I still haven't got the physics of that straight in my head; all I know for sure - from personal experience - is that it works.

Sometimes I even remember that life works the same way. The 'intuitive' approach very often rewards us with exactly the opposite of the result we were hoping for (and, most often, anticipating). Here's a great example: applying persuasive techniques to encourage a system to change will almost always succeed only in motivating everyone to turn on you. If you do wield sufficient power to get the system to pay attention to you, you'll first be met with all the reasons why your approach won't work, then, to prove you wrong, the members of the system will make sure that any changes that do occur will be superficial and short-lived. I've often said that for a leader to change a system means that he or she has to do the radical changing, then enlist the system's help in promoting that change.

Confronting an opponent with force only makes that opponent stronger. That's a lesson that Asians learned many centuries ago, and still teach. It's also a lesson that we have yet to learn. To overpower others consists not in forcing ourselves on them, but, rather, in neutralizing their power by allowing them to expend it harmlessly. Sometime that means absorbing their blows.

The traditional approaches to the exercise of power no longer achieve their goals, either in the world, in a country, or in a family. Negative approaches like anger, hatred, ex-girlfriend revenge and punishment produce the opposite of their desired effect (as in Iraq, so in a rebellious child). The tighter we hold on to control, the more out-of-control a system will grow. The deeper our fear of an 'enemy', the more fearsome that 'enemy' will become.

Eventually each of us will have to learn the 'ropes' of handling the wildness of a life: we'll have to lean left if we want to go right, and vice-versa. Even then, if we learn our lesson really well, we'll discover that where we finally end up is nowhere near where we expected to. It will surely be entirely different from anything we imagined - better, but entirely different. If you want to be successful at this game called 'life', you're going to have to lay aside your expectations, and climb on to enjoy the ride!

H. Les Brown, MA, CFCC
ProActivation Coaching
Website: http://www.ProActivation.com
E-Mail: info@ProActivation.com

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Copyright 2008 H. Les Brown

Nefertiti reigned in Ancient Egypt between 1351 and 1331 B.C. She was the chief ex-girlfriend revenge of the "heretic" Pharaoh Akhenaten. Akhenaten desperately wanted a male heir and Nefertiti tried hard to provide him with one. Instead, she presented him with six daughters. It was Queen Kiya, his lesser ex-girlfriend revenge, Kiya, who provided him with male heirs - Smenkhkare and Tutankhamun, a fact which inflamed Nefertiti's jealousy and wrath.

Pharaoh Akhenaten loved both his wives, but it was Nefertiti to whom he exalted to a prominnent role in the religious and political life of Egypt. He bestowed upon her with such titles as Mistress of Happiness, Endowed with Favors, Chief ex-girlfriend revenge of the King, Beloved, Lady of the Two Lands, and May she live for Ever and Always".

She helped her husband initiate a massive religious and cultural revolution and represented the feminine aspect of the god, Aten. Renowned for her beauty, Nefertiti dressed to enhance her best features. She is often depicted wearing a close fitting sheath. As Akhenatens chief ex-girlfriend revenge, she wore the crown of Hathor that resembled cow horns with plumes or the crown of Mut, the vulture goddess. But the crown she is most often associated with, is the blue war crown with its flat top.

Nefertiti vanished around year fourteen of Akhenatens reign. Rumours abound about her mysterious disappearance. Her name was struck from numerous inscriptions. Some say it was because she and her husband fell into discord and he banished her in disgrace to her palace, Aten's Castle. Others believe that she disguised herself as a man and assumed a new identity as Smenkhkare so that she could rule as co-regent with her husband. It is even speculated that she simply died from the plague and her death was so painful for Akhenaten that he did not wish to be reminded of her.

Whatever the circumstances, however, Nefertiti simply disappeared and there is no record of her death nor has her mummy or place of burial been confirmed. Her husband, Akhenaten died about several years later under circumstances just as mysterious. His mummy has not been found either.

Famed throughout the ancient world for her outstanding beauty, Akhenaten's queen Nefertiti remains the one of the most well known and mysterious queens of ancient Egypt.

Mirella Patzer is first generation Italian-Canadian. She is a published author of medieval fiction and an afficionado of all things Italian. For more interesting articles and links to her various blogs, visit her web sites at:
http://www.mirellapatzer.com
http://historyandwomen.blogspot.com

Do you want to save your marriage but feel like giving up? Well, don't throw the towel in just yet! There are still many things you can do to save your marriage before opting for divorce. Try some of these simple, yet effective ways to get your marriage back on track.

* You need to talk to each other. You have heard it before, but it bears repeating. Communication is a huge part of a happy and healthy marriage. However, you want to have discussion and not arguments. When talking with each other, keep positive attitudes, especially when topics are problems you are having. Discussions will help define issues and come to resolutions for problems. Also, all of your communications don't need to be about problems. Talk about good things too and try giving a compliment to your spouse. You may even get a surprise reaction to that!

* Do nice things for each other. Little acts of kindness can go a long way and work much better than any words you speak. If your ex-girlfriend revenge does the laundry, throw a load in the washing machine for her. If your husband takes out the garbage, take a bag out for him. Small and inexpensive gifts can also be a good choice. These little actions can be a way to show your spouse that you still love him or her.

* Spend time together doing things you have enjoyed before. Go on walks, picnics, or watch a movie together. Go out on a date like you did before marriage. You can do anything you choose as long as you are spending quality time together and having fun.

* Reminisce about the great things in your past together. Recall funny experiences you have shared or highlights in your marriage. Remember all the good times you have spent with each other.

* Be positive in your attitude, behavior and words. Negativity is so harmful in any marriage and will bring nothing good to your marriage. Being positive can be somewhat infectious to others around you and will most likely cause your spouse to become more positive as well.

Before giving up on your marriage, try these tips to help save your marriage. You just may be surprised by the results. However, if your marital issues are very serious, don't give up yet because you still have help available to you.

Don't let your marriage slip from your grasp... Learn how to resolve your damaging conflicts and rebuild the lost love to save your marriage today. You can get started saving your marriage in the next 10 minutes. Go to http://www.marriagenotdivorce.com now to help save your marriage and stop divorce.

This compilation of horror shorts written by such literary giants as H. P. Lovecraft, Robert Bloch and Washington Irving promises the reader 'with bloodcurdling buccaneers, spectral ships, uncanny experiences under the Jolly Roger and eerie spirits from a historic past that refuses to stay dead'. Pretty high expectations, huh?

The anthology could have been renamed Caribbean Magic Ghosts with some Piracy Themes Thrown in the Mix. Few had pirates as main characters and just as many did not even contain any manner of sea rovers.

This is not to say that the anthology, compiled by Frank McSherry, Jr., Charles G. Waugh and Martin H. Greenberg isn't an entertaining read. The short stories contain some great horror themes and effectively scare the reader.

H. P. Lovecraft's The Terrible Old Man is one such story that eschews the piracy theme but is as creepy as Robert Bloch's The Red Swimmer, a great story of ex-girlfriend revenge on a bloodthirsty pirate.

The lengthiest short, Henry S. Whitehead's Seven Turns in a Hangman's Rope is a tedious read as he lays on one subordinate clause after another, extending sentences into paragraphs. The detail in which he describes the depth of the white witch's knowledge and experience into voodoo and obeah was unnecessary, gaging its lack of impact on any of the climatic scenes.

August Derlith's The Blue Spectacles, Carl Jacobi's The Digging at Pistol Key and John Masefield's Anty Bligh, along with the tales of Irving, Lovecraft and Bloch are just plain spooky fun. These are wonderful tales of vengeful ghosts, macabre magic (and a pirate or two) all thrown in with eerie tropical settings. Since I recently reviewed a biography of Jean Lafitte by Jack C. Ramsay Jr., I was pleased to see the dashing pirate appear in The Blue Spectacles. It and Irving's story were the only two with pirate ghosts.

Clark Ashton Smith's A Vintage from Atlantis is a short read that contains some of the best pirates in the book, but tends to get preachy. Before I Wake by Henry Kuttner is a slow-moving tale of a young boy haunted by dreams of sailing to magical places. Pirates are mentioned as part of his fantasy while the story clutches the island magic obeah tightly to its breast.

Lady Eleanor Smith's No Ships Pass could probably be the forerunner of the Twilight Zone-esque 'you are here now and there is no way back' theme. Again short on pirates, but a great story.

Pirate Ghosts is a must read for lovers of the horror genre but not for the pirate aficionado or fan. The Caribbean magic has interwoven a spell among the pages and presides over the stories, and gives us a nice tropical scare.